Kris Allen: Jason Mraz mixed with John Mayer and a splash of orgasmmm
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
i have a feeling he has a nice dick. i can just sense it.
How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
Everything about him screamed your future.
It is 8 o'clock in the morning and there is already blood all over one of the stalls in the bathroom. What has your St. Patrick's day done for you?
Yea.. I remember nothing. Except that the taxi driver was 56 years old and apparently never cheated on his wife.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
Hey, just wanted to let you know that University Police stopped by and repossessed the stolen laundry basket. And the 8 bottles of detergent.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Metaphysical thesis on the illusion of self+ 2 day adderal binge = the walls of reality are crumbling
A toast to whoever set this year's daylight savings fallback to the day after halloween, granting us another hour to detox before we pretend to be functional adults. Clearly, a partier with forethought and clear priorities. Cheers!
I want a musical about memes.
Just to clear things up, yes you did lick the strippers butt
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