Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
My vagina would be awesome. I would be the most popular girl in the village.
I just fucked my ex's ex's ex. Love quadrilateral complete
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Did I seriously kick a door down last night... And if so when where and how hard, cause that shit I do not recall.
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I finally got the glitter off in time to get to the party and bang the bday boy in the bathroom while his girlfriend was lighting the bday cake candles.
How much booze could a drunk brad chug when a drunk brad does chug booze?!?
All. The answer is always all
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I thought since you asked to see my dick I might as well say hi
I had to pee so bad that I snuck into the bathroom while they were in the shower. At her request, he was massaging her boobs so they could grow faster. Also there was a laser light machine.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
