i woke up with a shirt on. the kids in my daycare group had a lot of questions when i took off my shirt at the pool to reveal "property of brittany" written on my chest and an arrow pointing to my dick.
I was wasted and lost so I called the cops and asked for directions. It seemed logical at the time
she thought the capital of kansas was topanga.
Considering he believes im part of the 2016 us curling team id say hes pretty drunk
..i think i can hear you losing your virginity
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
I just hate that one day I'll have to tell our children how we met, makes me look like a gold digging whore
Cleaning my pipe and using the left over resin solution to make THC laced rolling papers and a jar of hash oil/honey for my tea
WE USE THE WHOLE BUFFALO
Did you get any pics? And I can only imagine how inferior you must have felt knowing that somewhere in that room was a guy whose penis was the length of your forearm.
She was two things I dont understand: tall and Christian
Ugh. The fucking vaginal recession is so real right now.
You told your family you're bi over the phone?!
We were talking about exes and it just came out....and so did I.
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Why were you naked on your bathroom floor?
It was a "get entirely naked to take a shit" kind of blackout I think.
How is there a hawk inside this house? More importantly how the hell is he handling it without any gear?
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