Those kids are glorified dude-bros. It's banal.
I have a hot bod, but my face sucks, what can i do?
why are there goldfish crackers all over my bed?
you decided you wanted to name them & keep them as pets.
But why is there no point in liking him? Does he have herpes? Is he married? Is he gay? Did he get his penis chopped off in a freak accident? If the answer is no to all of the above, then he is fair game
He said something pertaining to Ragu and vodka I'm worried
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I dont think she was a real nurse but she was good at it. wish I rememebrd her name
This is a pre-sorry for hitting on and then sleeping with you're ex
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
You cannot meet up with him at the tailgate, his parents are there. What are you going to say "Hi I'm the one who fucks your son, can I get a cheeseburger?"
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
A 'Bear Fight' is a car bomb followed by a Jaeger bomb. Fuckface and I do those on slow days. Tonight, we did a 'Polar Bear on Fire'. Fireball, a bear fight in the middle, and end with rumple minze.
I made friends at the beach bars tonight. Several were worried for my well being.
I found a tomato seed inside my jeans. I did not eat tomatoes
Randomize
