he texted me telling him i gave him the clap. but i think he gave it to me and i gave it back to him
this year's halloween challenge: make audrey hepburn go from classy to slutty drunk
Next time I say "Watch this" Get me the fuck out of the bar.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
Tid bit for you to add to your "what to expecting when you're expecting to lose your virginity" book... Sex on nyquil is cheaper and BETTER than sex on esctacy AND you sleep like a champ after so you're not able to think about any bad decisions made.
We 6 way cheers-ed with French fries last night, hammered, in the booth.
There is a drunk marine passed out on my porch. Mandy wouldn't sleep with him, Can you please come remove him?
I feel like that's something that he should've asked me over dinner..... instead of with his hand down my pants? maybe not
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
I had a dream last night that I used a condom when I had sex. That's how I knew it was a dream
I can't hang out tomorrow. A boy wants to feed me ice cream and touch my boobs. Priorities.
I've just had my first cup of coffee in a month and I moaned at the first drink and honestly I think this is the most sexual expreiance in 6 months
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
With a word you would own me. At your command I would walk to your house completely naked.
he put a condom on for a handjob WTF
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