There was an extended period of my adolescent life where my friends and I would get high, drive around in my minivan listening exclusively to the wu tang clan, and intentionally crash into snowbanks
nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
Does slim fast make a chocolate heart for valentines? If so that's what she's getting.
You did a strip tease for the toilet.
There is a contact in my phone named "Bar Mcntysu." this is why we need a third person to go out with us.
Like there's an 87% chance I'll end up on the bedroom floor demanding sex while freestyling in your face. I'm going to buy rum.
Oh thank Jesus fuck for my shitty infertile womb. Crisis averted
I mean I'm into guys with money but more into guys I'm actually attracted to
yeah i guess i'd rather he was hot than rich
wow i don't know if that qualifies as growing up but if it does i'm all in
What happened to my knees?
You ate shit in front of the homeless people. They applauded.
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
The bend and snap? 98% success rate of getting attention. When used appropriately, it has an 83% rate of return on a dinner invitation.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I've done dumber things than this for flimsier reasons. Come with. If I pull it off I need a witness, and if I fail I need an escape plan.
I lost my cyber virginity to a guy I barely knew in high school while a Togepi Plushie watched.
Randomize
