im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
guys don't fucking realize that the only place girl like their faces jizzed on is in PORN, and that "squirting" is piss. JUST FUCKING PISS.
Haha, bad night?
i have a surprise for you that looks bigger since I found my body hair trimmer
He is the Donovan McNabb of stuff up his ass. Tell me that tomorrow. Too high to remember.
I enjoyed our heart to heart in the trunk on the way to the stripclub
You're getting a blowjob this afternoon. This has been your morning public service announcement.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
I just used crown royal bags as pot holders...
Best part of leaving the university? Interns are as hot as my former students, not legally off limits, and they will do anything for a full time job.
I feel like I was playing penis roulette last night nd I landed on the wrong one.
*goes to show prof a picture* *forgets tit pic is in camera roll*
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
Dude she is fucking shit up. Her baby would be proud
There. There is gum on my butt cheek IT IS NOT MINE
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