I just google mapped his house on satellite so i can really see how much money he has. Does that make me shallow?
weed, chlorine, and victory. my bed smells like i had sex with michael phelps.
you dont remember trying to break dance in the middle of the casino floor on ur own throw up?
oh that explains alot.
She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
I'm actually glad you're quitting. Now there's one less person at work who's seen me naked.
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
Yeah kinda weird. My grandparents are here for dinner and I'm chilling on the couch close to tripping out on pain killers. My pap asked me how works going and I prettymuch drooled on myself as an answer.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
His name sounds so important....sounds like the name of my future baby daddy to me.
the straight edge chick smoked with me, because according to her my bowl is pretty
also, am i correct in guessing that advertising the size of my hypothetical penis is a turnoff to him?
Bro i pulled the fucking willy wonkas gold ticket of ratchets the other night this chick was a real treat god bless her
The sex may be the only reason I like him. I've confused the multiple orgasms for feelings.
Is it day drinking when the suns up like when does that start
asking for a friend
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