ron's 8" boning knife is for sale. oh and it comes with a flavor injector.
High?
hahahahaha turkey breast
FOR A FUCKING 40?! A FUCKING 40?! YOU GAVE THE CAT AWAY FOR BEER?!
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
His sombrero wouldn't fit in the car and I had to buy him some Jack to make him stop bitching. You owe me
I feel like I can hear facebook. What did we smoke?
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I have never appreciated strippers so much. Ma'am, you are an artist
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
Halloween: the only night of the year wheee the more high I get, the more it compliments my makeup and outfit.
I'm sharing a breakfast burrito w my uber driver
I'll start working on my manners when you stop using please and thank you in the bedroom.
Well I had to have sex with him so he would buy me plan b. The fact that I had sex with someone else last night who couldn't afford it is irrelevant.
At one point did I say I have a doctorate in fuck u?
I feel like you should store your weed in something that suits your personality. For example mines in a hollowed out disney princess book.
Randomize
