Do I give off a "I have a sex tape" vibe???
sometimes i look at this picture of your cock before i go to sleep, there's something comforting about it
dunno man, last I saw him he bet me he could eat more ranch the me, then ran off
Clearly that person doesn't understand how efficient getting drunk and working out at the same time is.
I'm so tired of waking up with my bed full of deli meats.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
How hard to you think I will be judged if I order 8 giant pickles from Jimmy Johns right now?
I drink to make the karaoke go away.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I don't care how great the sex was, I cannot unsee what has been seen. I regret ever stalking his Facebook.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Ur wingman ability is causing serious doubt
Ok first off its WAY easier if you are actually here
You partied and then got cock slapped, Don't tell me you didn't have fun
while giving me head, she stopped, looked up at me smiling and said "ill never be able to look at bananas the same way again" and then went back to work.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Randomize
