piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
My Vagina smells like Nemo again.
You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
Roller skating + drunkeness + peeing = mess
winter break is gonna be like a weird mixture of rehab fat camp and holiday cheer.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
I just snuked. Sneezed and puked
update: last drink of the night and im naked in my porch hammock. life is good.
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
Only I could run tino my father in law while looking at condoms at Rite Aid. At 730 on a Thursday morning. I'm in trouble.
Just ate tuna on a frozen waffle because we were out of bread.
This is why you don't have nice things.
Honestly, it's his loss. He went for the free sample when he could've gotten the whole package, babes.
does that make me the free sample at the grocery store he didn't like enough to buy...? yeah, that advice didn't help, but thanks.
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
Good luck getting that all cat food off in the shower dumbass
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
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