you rearended a car with your bike and then puked all over his back windshield. They made BUI's for you.
do guys with small dicks even attempt to pursue romantic relationships?
Its the little things i like about bein home like having actual toilet paper instead of subway napkins
I drove to Chevron at noon and the Hatian lady goes "Oh, nothing to drink yet white boy?"
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
I know you claim to have a large penis but I do not believe in what i cannot see. Sort of like god.
I wouldn't blow him for all the queso in the world.
I'd rather blow that homeless guy who asked me to breast feed him.
I found him stumbling up to our building with a solo cup under his arm. . . He told me it was his favourite thing ever. He also told me hes never been drunk before.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
That's totally the Emoji for "just ran into some girl who knows I know she had an abortion"
You fell asleep mid blowjob with my vibrator in your HAND. So no, I will not bring you pizza.
Will you rub my calves while I masturbate?
Just leave a note saying "riding dick see you in the mornig"
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
The only good thing about 2020 is that the hot flight attendant neighbors are using my pool a lot. If i can keep them from wandering into my Zoom meeting with my boss I’m golden
Randomize
