A joint and a Nerds Rope = breakfast of champions for the unemployed
Mr. Last Night just informed me I told him to be very quiet when he left this morning and high-fived him as a goodnight kiss. Drunk me is slutty and manly.
so he came on my face and then proceeded to say "that was just how i imagined it would happen"
where do you find these guys?
I just want him to slap me with his dick and call it love
I always give him head in random places, it's a guessing game for his cock.
he broke up with her mid blow job, and somehow convinced her to finish. I want his life
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
Just drank an entire bottle of champagne for lunch. It's gonna be that kind of semester.
I would let Bear Grills repel down a waterfall using my dick if I could go to sleep right now.
just texted my dealer that i could taste the blue but not the cheese. i said i could taste blue.
He wrote his entire dissertation last night. I can only imagine the frightening amount of headway he would make if he ever did things sober.
Is it okay that we fucked on my car hood, in his driveway, at 4 am with cars passing by ?
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
So who has the penis shaped party tray? You or your mom?
Trust me, I’ve got a sixth sense about dicks that tells me if a guy knows how to fuck and it’s tingling. You need to prove me right!
I’m not going to bang him just to confirm your Dickth Sense
The Dickth Sense!!! I love it! It’ll be our first porno!
Randomize
