there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
just friend requested my arresting officer from last night. too soon??
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I've been watching anime, masturbating and eating nutella for three days. I hope she never comes back.
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
For some reason i am carrying prostate cancer brochures. i am nor used to drinking this early.
Stripperoke is exactly what it sounds...
She just flushed the toilet with her head inside it...
Is this girl REALLY making a smoothie in the bathroom right now?
You were walking around in your swim suit, an open robe, snow boots and a death grip on that handel of captain morgan.
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
the reason i can drink whatever i want and you have a limit is because whiskey will never make my pussy not work
People have been asking me if I'm going to the reunion lately. It occurs to me that everyone wants me there to feel that much better about themselves.
I spent a good part of the night in a bear hat claiming I'd changed spieces
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
Randomize
