Turn sideways at McDonald's = actual directions to a winery
a girl in my class is on a twilight fan site and running her fingers on the screen as edwards body comes up.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I'm not embarrassed about the lap dance. I'm embarrassed for the singing during.
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Can you explain to me how i got kicked out of a bar last night, from outside the bar?
Regular drunk falling on flat ground did not prepare me for drunk falling into a pile of firewood.
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
We're not on Beacon Street anymore so now your argument about not peeing on the sidewalk holds no water. Whereas my bladder has holded every water.
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
well I tackled her when she was going to go upstairs because I was convinced that the house was haunted. You gotta stick together in horror movies.
I told her it would be awesome. We are all the same people. One of us would always be drunk, one of us would always be hooking up, and one of us would always be crying into a pancake.
We talked about breaking up, had sex, and in the middle of said sex, talked more about breaking up- best sad day ever
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
11:30 and people are pissing in the sink. It's gonna be a good night.
Randomize
