What would a frattoo be? Maybe like the Chinese symbol for Keystone Light.
i just google searched 'can you pop your ovary'
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
and you tried to get a free burrito from Potbelly's
I am in the checkout line at the dollar store and there is a guy in front of me holding a pregnancy test, a chocolate bar, and fake roses. Champion.
Im eating the cereal I found in my pocket and drinking wine out of the bottle.
I want to hold her baby but I'm afraid I'll give it a contact buzz
I walked in on her just letting her nose bleed into her friend's hands
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
I don't want to sleep with anyone. I just want a burrito
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
Like I said, all hypothetical...unless, of course, you'd be into that. My heart may skip a beat.
Sorry for peeing on your books last night. I wouldn't leave them next to the window anymore.
Dude, I just masturbated with my cat sleeping on my boobs....
You have GOT to get this crazy cat lady thing under control. I'm finding you a man. And you'll take him, and thank me. After that text, you have no right to be picky.
Randomize
