all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
he got his own cum in his own eye. TWICE. how do you make that mistake again?
his name is not nearly as fun as i thought to yell out in bed
She asked me why I was wearing a Batman Suit. Have I ever needed a reason to wear a Batman Suit?
My cab driver just texted me 'goodnight beautiful'. I think my 'desperate for a guy phase' has just moved into a fuck my life phase.
Yeah, he said he was getting "welcome back Winnipeg Jets drunk" then puked on his jersey.
apparently we spent 30 minutes inside that big Nike store turning all of their Duke gear inside out. for some reason the employees didn't stop us.
Yep and i guess after he came back from that he sat down next to me and i just put my hand right on his penis just casually like it was his leg
This is love.
Which part? The alcoholic cupcakes or the lesbian st paddys day party?
figured after she passed out and i threw up in her bed, morning sex would be pushing it.
Which I'm also surprisingly fine with. If he walked into the bedroom naked, holding a fish in one hand and a lit candle in the other and said "Let's get fucking weird." I'd probably go with it. He's just that hot.
It's like my life is one of those movies where after a bunch of outlandish events that only happen in a movie the girl realizes her true life calling and lives a great life with a sexy man of multiple races. But I'm stuck in the fucked up part where 25 year olds come in their pants.
I should not be this drunk in a place where a girl is wearing a princess dress
Accidentally made a straight guy question his sexuality again. I really gotta watch myself.
Girl in front of me just swan dove into the middle of the carpeted hallway, stood up, clapped for herself, and then continued walking. My life is complete.
Randomize
