she smelled like a LAN party
tonight's goal was "most regrettable decision" and you bring wine coolers?
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
at russian wedding, no open bar. bottles of vodka at table. getting to work tomorrow may be an issue.
It's amazing how many friends she makes simply by carrying that flask of whiskey everywhere she goes.
He's basically like a fancy dildo that buys me dinner.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
I put chex mix in your purse for when you get hungry while doing your walk of shame tomorrow!
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
he may or may not have motorboated me on the steps of the library of congress
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
i think it’s okay to see him. you just can’t wind up with his penis in your mouth again
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
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