like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
ironically, his detergent was also "small and mighty"
The higher i get, the less gay he looks, and the more i want to make out with him. This is dangerous.
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
hungover and i feel like a burrito
like eating one or like you are one?
like i am one.
idk. I was on the deck with Dominic and i felt something weird on my arm. I looked down and you were licking my elbow.
A whole bunch of large men eating Doritos just knocked on my door and asked if they could take out my trash?
and by clear my head i mean get drunk and cry myself into oblivion.
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
Remind me to call McDonald's to give a good review of Ruth. She truly demonstrated grace under pressure.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
i've got three words. i. was. spanked.
My boss is paying me to come clean his house in a maid outfit and told me not to tell anyone....this is shady as fuck but I need the money
Hey! Its not the first time I've been eaten out in a bridesmaids dress in a church by a groomsman!
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