i was shrooming and she was sobbing. i was trying to be sympathetic, but i could see the veins working like worms under her skin. and then her face stripped down to the muscle.
what was she crying about?
i wanna say it was the lack of skin on her face but maybe she lost her job.
Billy Mays is dead too!
Somewhat annoying American icons better be watching their backs
Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
It was like my butthole was peeing. Felt comforting yet not fulfilling.
whispering "taste the rainbow" well having sex isn't my biggest turn on.
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
Chicken salad taco, you know, when you're out of bread and crackers, and high.
you're trying to get a guy who's been in a coma for 2 weeks and who thought he was in '08 yesterday to drive you to the liquor store?
yeah, you wanna come?
Tranny group. Dance off. Horse hair and dicks swinging. I. Cant. Unsee. This.
I accidentally kneed him in the balls while trying to straddle him so we ended up spending the night watching ffm porn online
New drinking game: Drink while you Drink. I'll explain the rules when I see you, needless to say, it's not difficult. Unless you enjoy sobriety, humanity and life. Bestest.
I truly wish I could say I pulled my groin straddling our cab driver but unfortunately I cannot
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
Randomize
