I'm just looking at Lindsay Lohan's vagina.
Oh yea! I was just doing that too!
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
it can't be normal that my body odor smells like fries
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
BIGGER SANDWIJH COME NIW OR DIE
Does the blue bra belong to your sister or cousin?
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
My life is over. I farted in open court. Noticeably. The judge looked at me. It echoed.
you said you would race him to taco bell but you slipped in the parking lot and just laid there, crying
Can I come over? I respect you, but I want disrespectful things to happen
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
You are driving me to get new toys, i am test driving them on the way home.
We are taking your truck.
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Currently using my kid's computer to charge my vibrator. #thisis30ish
I'll get the most aesthetic strap on, you'll see
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