I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
You don't understand, Single Ladies is like the Don't Stop Believing of the gay community.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
i was staring at it trying to desperately see a vagina
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
This is the point in ur life where u should realize there's nothing left but a spiral of shame
I should but I don't. All I see is an escalator of success
Dude. I'm super jealous I'm not there. Plus I look really pretty tonight, I'm wearing my long blue dress, I have long blonde hair, and I'm just sitting here hitting Larry the Long Bong. I'll pretend like your 3 spirits are floating in my smoke. Fuck.
Btw if you ever get emails that pretty much contain 'bwahhhhh jatkkvsweuo' it's safe to assume it's me.
The fact that my boss lets me drink on my lunch break makes Mondays much easier.
THE FASTEST WAY TO MY HEART IS THROUGH FAMILY SIZED BAGS OF GENERIC BRAND CHEESE BALLS
My feet surprised me
Hey I didn't mean to come across like I was judging you about your liberal sexual choices. I would like details of your threesome if you need to talk about it!
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