so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
you dont want to live with me, im always naked, a chronic masturbator, a bit of a voyeur and will likely touch you while you sleep. ps- i can pick locks
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
We hung out in the bathroom the whole time and talked about sex and watched some girl pee. If you don't believe I was there, check the bathtub for bread crust.
peeing on that welcome mat was like, the highlight of my week
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
No, she passed out instead. I have the worst luck, its like Jesus is mad at me for having the same birthday as him
If I get laid, we are framing that mattress and hanging it on the wall as the place we both lost our virginities.
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
She has either a C-Section scar or a bullet wound, I can't quite tell
But the real question is how many people didn't see my dick last night?
I'm trying to decide whether it's worth it to masturbate in this gas station bathroom
That makes sense.. A good Bj is a trump card in any argument
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
