in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
my mom walked in on my vaccuming.......i wasnt vaccumming
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
I think I've hugged the toilet more times than I've hugged my own family members.
He tried to cuddle with me after we hooked up and i just looked at him and said why are you still here?
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
i gave up on the vacation being fun the night i ate all the marshamallows out of the lucky charms while everyone else was having sex in the condo
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
rollerskate sex sounded like a good idea...
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Bourbon is too strong for my cat, he does not want to drink it
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Just because your drunk doesn't mean you can stick your dick in the snow. Just a FYI
Did you put my shoes in the freezer.
Nope. I did however put them in the kiddie pool you pissed in in the living room before Tyler put them in the freezer. Ass hole.
Randomize
