Hi Jason, it's Liz. We dont need you to pick us up anymore. I dont care if you will be here in a milisecond. And you should know im wearing really amazing shoes.
boyfriend complimented me on my new prada shoes today. he is officially either gay or the man im gonna marry. knowing my luck it's all of the above.
There was a pool of blood on my desk and we still don't know who it belongs to. missed a good party, man.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I have new birth control, three bottles of jack, and some coupons for micky d's. You wanna have that sleepover?
bouncer thought i was tryin to get the license plate numbers of strippers to stalk them. I had to go show him where I threw up to get back in.
Should I feel bad that my boyfriend pays for my birth control and his friends get to reap the benefits?
Tip of the day: Don't ever send a bootycxall at 3 in aftnoon. No one will respond n u'll just feel fooolish.
I found a bag of weed while packing. Now packing is like creating tiny universes inside of boxes.
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
Plus idk what to say. Like hello dapper gentleman will you pursue me in a midnight hangout where I can be choked
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
He just took off his shirt. I'll text you later.
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