I just beat off to a cartoon porn video. what has my life come to
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
I woke up hungover and opened my laptop to find that i had googled alcoholism again
Where else am I to apply my creativity?
I don't know. Anywhere productive and not involving sex toys would be a start.
moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund
I had a great penis washing session in the sink before I left. Washed off all the bar and green beer
Never thought I'd say this but I just want to go home, ice my balls, and pop a Vicodin.
True. I'd rather snort cocaine off a homeless guy then work on the weekend...Actually that may not be that bad.
and then she started to quack like a duck and u started throwing bread at her
He taught me where the gears in a five speed are with his penis.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I just had to explain to an 70+ year old lady what 'coitus' was. This was not in my job description.
Thanks for bringing that stuff to help me feel better...you know, the water, the Gatorade, and the dick. You really are the best friend ever.
i made out with his shirt. MDMA, man.
Randomize
