East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
guy in front of me on the bus did 12 yrs, hes teling me about how to knife fight
I totes stole your whore crown.
With great power comes great responsibility.
His internet history had "Disney Porn" on it.
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
My class coordinator for bio told us that the only thing we should do the night before an exam is to get laid. And then party down after the exam. I like him.
Sorry about coming to the pool in only a thong. I thought you said it was closed. Not that you were teaching a group of kids how to swim.
I'm fucking a man old enough to be my father who is also dating my boss. What have you done with your life?
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
Fuck you. Leave my nipples out of this. THEY DID NOTHING TO YOU
It's really hard to tweet with a pussy in your face demanding attention.
Randomize