its easy. just sleep with a bunch of guys until one falls in love
i walked in on him listening to enya, jacking off, and vomiting into a cup on his desk. are you serious.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
So he was supposed to be helping me with my math but instead we ended up drinking coconut rum in his basement and having sex. I think my mom was right, getting a tutor will be good for me. Relieves the stress.
He ate me out while I was wearing a tiara.... I think I could get used to this
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
Text me back. Urgent. It is a porta Keep the portal alive.
Is this the acid talking?
You know what, don't even answer. Just promise me you'll go to the Corner of Shame when you get home.
I'm currently giving my drug dealer relationship advice. He's a nice guy and all but I'm really just hoping I get some free weed
come over. We can flirt with the criteria for substance abuse and talk about our daddy issues
a homeless man let us know that my friend was asleep in the bushes outside my house on main street. So just a small get together.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
COME TO THE TOP OF THE MOUNTAIN AND I WILL GIVE YOU MY SAGE ADVICE.
When the bouncer wouldn't let you back in you screamed "Authority is not given you to deny the return of the king!" and ran past him.
I do have a history of lying to Customs. I once convinced them I was an astronaut.
Randomize
