But, the reference to being horny and then blending a banana is troubling
I masturbated on the webcams with my bf yesterday then typed without washing my hands first... then my roommate used my laptop it was pretty priceless
I'm drinking early times at a fridays on wednesday night. This entire bar is going to see my dick by last call.
The guy i fucked last week got done first on the test in my 900 person class. If im pregnant at least it will be smart.
Seriously man, I'm worried that my dick's going to fall off someday if I keep this up...
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
At the ER. Dropped bottle lead to cut foot which led to me drunk hitting on doctors. Not going well.
My mouth feels like I've been chewing on leather and firecrackers for the past 3 days
I made a Russian puke. I outdrank a Russian. I am unstoppable.
I don't know what weirder, the fact that I flat out said "I thought I deleted you from facebook" or that she responded with "I just hacked your account and readded myself". Never thought I'd say this but I wish drunk me would stop making friends!
So the day after the 4th I'm sitting here drinking Molson and watching NHL free agent frenzy. From patriotic American to drunken Canadian in 24 hours flat. Booyah.
Things I have learnt this week: bubble mix is toxic. Extremely toxic.
I think I've been there, but who knows? I drink a lot
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
As much as I want you to bang someone other than me, he is an asshole.
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