I'm jammin out to some Brit Birt, she's still my bitch, I love her crazy ass
If I'm having a dream where I'm having sex and I can actually feel it between my legs because I've had a lot of it recently, does that make me a whore?
I have a feeling this is a serious question. Problem solve, Jess.. I'm going to let you figure that one out on your own
The sex was so not worth the four dollars it cost to drive over the bridge
she told me she was pregnant in a never have i ever game
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
you came downstairs saying you were now 'dressed to impress'
what was i wearing?
nothing
Sharon took in a random bleeding stranger drunker than her, named her Nicole, and is feeding her jello shots on the toilet
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
the creek. my friends left me at a party next thing i know im in a breaststroke relay race with a bunch of randos in the dark
I feel like ass. I'm missing 12 hours of my life and all I have to show for it is an empty wendys bag. Those Shrooms were too much... When do we do it again?
I'm cutting her off I can't have my good name soiled with these kinds of shenanigans
Shit is preposterous
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
It will pretty much be equal to the feeling I had when you let me hold your dick while you were peeing, or when I graduated high school!
No I dont want him to bring his twin brother, cause then ill have to entertain him with my vagina
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