Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
I gave her the chance to be interesting and she failed. So then I gave her a chance to be slutty and she failed at that too.
My balls are about to become a huge part of your mouth's life
yeah he was eating me out and i didnt know someone made popcorn so I thought the smell was comming from my vagina
wtf
I would like to apologize for making you the target of my "I wish head hair grew as fast as Pubes speech" the other night
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
pre-gaming in the library. just gonna keep going until i'm too drunk to keep working and then i'll be there.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
What's the address?
Too drunk. Just google it.
IT'S YOUR HOUSE
Just got kicked out of two hot tubs. We were naked the second time. So awkward getting out in front of the security guard.
He carried around a bottle of jäger the whole night and when everyone thought the cops came, he started doing push ups in the middle of the floor cause he said it calmed him down.
Ok. As long as I can keep Kevin contained to the room I'll be ok. If not u might have a naked puking Kevin at ur door
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Whoever said it shouldn't take a man to make you happy clearly wasn't having sex everyday.
Hey does the gas gauge in your car work?
Nevermind...we figured it out. Heres a more relevant question, does your insurance have roadside assistance?
Randomize
