My mom foundout about my dui nd just called me to come home. I just took acid like 30 min ago. Wht should i do?
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
i'm telling everyone you had sex with a puerto rican drug lord
im in a room full of women tattooing each others tits. i hope i remember this tomorrow
we're about an hour out, how's the weather?
cloudy with a chance of strippers and cocaine, you're favorite. welcome home.
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
If I had a dick as big as yours. The world would be an oyster. An oyster smaller than my big penis
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
Using the random money I found in my bra from Halloween to pay to print my bio notes. I only brought a debit to the bar. College win.
You told me that they girl who was giving you a handjob under the table looked a little like your sister
I just bought us acid. I'm like the drug tooth fairy. Get ready to wake up with a sweattart of acid under your pillow.
Just woke up in a Price Chopper bathroom stall with a half eaten cake on the floor. Had to get a ride from the waitress I made out with. What happened to "Don't let me drink Tequila?"
I lied.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
He was a foot taller than me and my hands were bigger than his, it's called Pity head
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