We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Omg Kevin Jonas is engaged!!!!!!
Omg really? To who. Gay marriage is only legal in like 3 states.
ok please explain why some one shaved half of my pubes?
i found a twelve pack under my bed. and a six pack in my closet. I'm like a fucking alcoholic squirrel.
Does she usually listen to trance and cut up broccoli when she's high?
you really need to stop getting laid in my dreams more than i do.
I will not be a drunk bitch. I will not be a drunk bitch. Chanting this until it's second nature.
Drinking in moderation can be fun. Drinking in moderation can be fun. Chanting this until it becomes true.
Cocaine can totally be concealed as MAC finishing powder. Drug dealer creds just went up 120 percent
He showed up riding a bike blasting the ghostbusters theme song. His name was Lasercat. Im in love.
Come over. I have beer, your weird ass vegan pizza, and a raging hard on.
Marry me.
Woke up with champagne in my hair and honey mustard on my hands. Strangely, I'm okau with this
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
I feel like I should send her I'm sorry I've been fucking your boyfriend flowers.
I'm drunkenly throwing popcorn at a spider, fuck him. Why does his scary 8 legs get to be happy?
I gave her the last ten dollars to my name and bitch comes back with a six pack of bud light and a pack of sour patch kids
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