Pappa wants mamma naked
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
Not only did I see you last night, you had me help you meet women by convincing them you were deaf and only I understood your sign language
I feel like I am becoming dumber sitting here in class than I would be sitting on the couch smoking weed.
Last night I dreamed I was having gay sex in prison. That's the last time we go to theme night at the club.
just woke up on my balcony. who won the super bowl?
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
We've given up. My vagina is tired of constant lonely nights and disappointments. This is our retirement.
I remember sitting in your lap naked saying I don't want to be all looks while you gently rocked me back and forth
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
Dipping my sugar cookies in a glass of fireball and creme soda. This is holiday spirit
We have sober sex! It's a real relationship.
Yeah, so if you ever try to steal it, just know my tongue's been on it in several occasions. All over it.
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