You know, I really only think drinking is a problem if you're not good at it.
you kept shouting how the only tree you would hump is an elm tree because they're under populated
oh ps. last night you kept telling me to calm down because everything was fine cause you were getting "arab money"...
She was perfectly content just sitting in the middle of everyone blowing bubbles in the air.
So what's going on?
We hit boys town to get stupid. I mean invading Iraq stupid.
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
Dude I just came exactly at the crescendo of the Catalina wine mixer duet from step brothers.. Advance to next level.
Who the fuck gets injured on a merry-go-round? HOW IS IT POSSIBLE??
There's no sexy way to moan the name Ernest. Or Ernie. This relationship is fucked
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I'm trying to cause a divorce, your hooking up with a felon, I think we need Jesus.
Sorry if that was awkward, i will never call you sober ever again
I was dressed as Waldo and the cops kept saying looks like we fuckin found you
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
the orange of my hangover Tang is hurting my eyes... my coworkers knew it was hangover Tang too.
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