you told him you liked to chip your nail polish to look like different countries. im gonna guess that no, you didn't sleep with him.
Well someone has to be the Christmas slut at the family dinner. I suppose it's my year to fill those shoes.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
She is trying to turtle bite me and when I pull away she says just let it happen. Then she pulled a poptart out of nowhere
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
I'm sure we could make a ball of yarn and a nickel into a drinking game
If it's up to me, I'll already have my pants on and walking out before he gets soft afterward.
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
He's getting Easter eggs filled with weed or Jell-O shots for his birthday
And i have once again masturbated to an amazing soundtrack. what a time to be alive
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
DETAILS
long story
just tell me the parts i wanna hear
weed, brooklyn, rough sex.
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
God yes pancakes and booze sounds like the best night ever.
Randomize
