saw you walking with that piece of shit
and that piece of shit just read that
2010 has been the year of the Eskimo brother. Let's see how many igloos we can shack in next year
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
we were running to make last call and you stopped me and said very seriously "if i fall, go on without me. just make sure theres a beer in my hand when you go"
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
A little light bondage fun never hurt anybody (erotic asphyxiation excluded). Car batteries attached to reproductive organs have.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
I would like to apologize once again for rubbing your thigh with my hands and face for a very long time last night.
I gotta say, I do way better with the ladies than I do the men. So if it turns out being gay is a choice, then I'm going to go ahead and choose it.
Still pimpin that dick in the cornfields. Now it's just transferred to the local bar.
i don't think i have enough personality to make it through this date sober.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
The power of my boobs compel you
I just volunteered myself to get tazed this should get interesting
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