I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
I decided to name my penis gatorade...is it in you?
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
think i got pink eye from a stripper in vegas. showgirls did not prepare me adequately for this. be kind, 2010.
she told me I give head better than a lesbian. I know it's a great compliment but it kind of threw me off.
If one more "stranger" walks up to me at the bar and asks how I have been, I am going to rehab.
Definitely just blazed with the housekeeper. That woman needs a raise
The night started going down hill when she shot the cashier in the face with the confetti gun we bought at 711.
It was an 11am booty call. We were both out of our element.
i love you man. i hope we fuck some serious shit up this summer.
She wouldn't put out on the first date. I think my boner put a hole in my mattress.
I feel like i'm walking on a never-ending field of baby sheep.
If you were to to ask if I just hid 4 shooters or Jameson it my bra and panties the anwer would be yes, yes I did
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
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