Is it 'vaginas' or 'vaginae?'. Either way there were a shit ton of them.
Do you think most people who work at an airport Chili's can pin point where their lives went wrong?
you started texting yourself and saying they were "divine messages from heaven" then you threw up on stacie's piano.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Is "you left your socks here, please come get them" a good way of saying "come fuck me?"
Also I have uncooked pasta. I was hoping that could get cooked at your place. Don't ask about the circumstances that I came into ownership of uncooked pasta
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
Just thought you should know, Im with josh now. Im no longer available for rent. I have a full time tenant now. Like, a year long lease at least.
So not the biggest tits he had his cock between. He could have lied.
No piss test, hell yeah
FALSE ALARM. PISS TEST. I NEED YOUR PISS.
logically I know i should probably study somewhere outside my dorm room, but if I do that then I cant drink and smoke half as much while i study
you blew the guy with all the harry potter paraphanelia didn't you
I love friends. Friendship is wonderful. I wish the rain was my friend
I'm just happy stripping was the reason you fractured your hand
Randomize
