if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
I told you I was good to drive
dumbass I drove... you sat in the passengers seat and steered with a paper plate
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
i didnt think "maybe you should take over" was a good thing to say when i couldnt get it up
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
Nothing says Welcome to America than having the international house watch a sorority girl puke over the edge of the porch at 8am.
unfortunetly they frown upon drunk on duty paramedics
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
YOU CAN'T JUST ADD EVERYONE WHO ENTERS MY VAGINA ON FACEBOOK WTF
Let us rub each other in fish scales and become mermaids
I'm just so full of love and alcohol
do you think mom is upset that i left with the stripper from her bachelorette party last night?
My vagina still hurts from yesterday. That's the last time I think riding a mop bucket is a good idea. Don't let me do that again
Randomize
