it cannot be done, he is unbreakable.
What?
..he cannot be seduced..she had to have roofied him.
Details.
All I know is that if italians start TIME TRAVELLING were all in a lot of trouble paizon
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
I'm single ladies-ing it in my kitchen alone. after I just made an intense new breakup cd and before I drown my sorrows by marinating alone in my jacuzzi later. I cant tell if this is a new low or a new high
you just kept yelling NO BUENO SENOR at the cashier and throwing coins at him, of course you were going to get kicked out of the grocery store
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
So yeah you need to stop having near death experiences at McDonalds.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
I don't trust myself to shower and not drown.
I fell asleep in my underwear on the deck. What the fuck.
This was the best text I've ever woken up to
And now whenever I see a documentary about dolphins, I think about sex, which is super weird
We were having a serious discussion about Blue's Clues and I just kept thinking, 'you've seen me naked'.
You should probably come home from vacation now. I make badddd decisions when you're gone.
Randomize
