is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
she made me cover her fishbowl with my shirt because she "didn't want to corrupt it."
yo your bro wants to know what time he got home and were you hosing him off
I'm tangled in a fishing net down at the harbor. This has nothing to do with Captain Morgan. Bring wirecutters.
This day sucks. I just wanna play ostrich and bury my head in your boobs.
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
my parents have to start far too many of our conversations with the sentence "this is an observation, not a judgment" than I'm proud of
Are you awake? I feel like I need to confess my sins to someone not on this side of the country.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
So I had Xanax for breakfast & I'm probably going to fuck my tennis instructor.
Well the good news of being walked in on, my mom says your tits are pretty. Then she added that hers were like that once. Fml
it was awkward when he was taking off my clothes and i had to help him undo my fanny pack
I quit doing blow for him. If that doesn’t say “I’m in love with you and want to marry you” idk what does
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
Wakes up in a cold sweat at 3am, 136 unread messages and the preview on the notification is "I JUST GOT TO THE INCEST PART"
Randomize
