I really think my ability to vom without making noise mmight be my most useful talent
he drunkenly confessed to whacking off before coming over so the sex'd be longer. this one's a keeper
nothing says platonic group sex like a campfire and smores
there was a trapeze. enough said
My drug dealer asked me out. What's the protocal for this?
So somehow I got from NYC to a suburban town in the middle of Jersey. At 4am. Thank god there are trains that can rectify my mistakes...
Her boyfriend was hitting on other girls while drunk. But, she said she was okay with it because she is a feminist and she supports all women's decisions.
I asked if he wants to help me spring forward at 2am on Sunday. He seems down.
My snow day: told Cam, "we're not dating today, we're just roommates." No bra, boxers, drinking whiskey by myself for the past 2 hours, yelling at The Ultimate Fighter reruns from 3 years ago.
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
Sooooooo Your wife and your girlfriend are making cat noises at one another via text
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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