so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
but there are maragaritas for $3 so that was all i needed to hear
I wonder what gingers are like in bed...as awkward as their hair or just as unique as it...?
You're the 8th person from last night to text me this morning and ask if I'm ok.
she tried giving me head in the pool. it was more entertaining than pleasurable
I feel like you pissing on my ping pong table isn't something to be proud of.
his extensive knowledge of the age of consent laws kinda scares me....
Dude. 21 days till I'm 21. It's the 21 day countdown. The 25 days of Christmas can suck my dick.
dude a monday night stripper made you motorboat her. you should get that checked out
should I tell them that both of them had sex with me last Saturday? it might be a relationship builder type of thing you know?
He said bring my breathalyzer and Anna's pepper spray, I didn't ask questions
The name of tonight's festivities is hereby decreed to be the "Honey Boo Boo Hootenanny".
Oh by "being festive" I mean make tacos for dinner.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
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