Mom and Dad are dead. Trust fund
I just made out with a guy for $7.
Did I get blown in the bathroom? Yes. Did she throw up cranberry juice on my shorts? Yes. Did she finish the job? Yes.
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
hes like my own personal sex toy i use him on the weekends and then i have the option to put him away all week
Please find an outlet that isn't stripping or getting drunk and arrested
I left boob prints on the hood of his car. Something to remember me by.
Do you remember trying to make pizzas with the domino workers last night...while trying to speak their language with them.. spanish?
Well I'm in the bathtub smoking a bowl and eating doritos and frosting so I might not be the one to advise you on this shit but I'll try.
I'd go lesbian for $50 and a good phone case.
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I had sex while you were puking this morning and I'm sorry. Kind of.
It's ok. I had sex while you were drunk crying last night. We're even.
Good news, finally found someone who remembers Saturday night. Bad news, everyone in the bar saw your penis
I hate her so much I want to fuck her boyfriend.
That was the first time ive ever slept with a girl with a q in her name
Randomize
