i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
i am officially better prepared for a hangover tomorrow than i was for christmas.
Just bought a breathalyzer and Sharpies, guess who thought of a new drinking game
After a couple hours you decided you were going to walk home but ten minutes later you called and said you'd puked by the side of the road and you needed us to drive you to the art museum.
I guess I realized I had a problem when I ordered 4 shots and told the bar wench to pour them all into 1 glass
I woke up at 6am to a knock and a naked guy at my window.
Dude. It's not even nine. I don't know yet.
Drink number four. Don't even tell me about its not even nine
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
I want him for more than banging and buying me potato salad. Is this what love feels like?
Apparently hitting a bong with your mouth half numb is hilarious but frustrating!
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
The cop took you back from the hospital and the lady at the front desk said "how are you doing cal?" You said "how do you know my name?" she responded "you're the only person i've ever seen that can throw up in your back pocket." Skills dude.
It's a draw. You need to settle it in Smash, Soul Calibur, and/or rock-paper-scissors, the last of which Steve claims is bullshit.
Randomize
