I think that i just found proof that harry and ginny had sex
I learned his name tonight. This now makes him a real person. Obviously, I no longer want to sleep with him.
Just hungoverly hit my funny bone with a hot straightener. Triple threat.
And my fence, why is part of it on the roof?
I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
Waking and baking has revolutionized how i brush my teeth. Seriously up to like 25 min everry morn. Highly recommend
No, but its not like diarrhea. i swear its like my intestines had a secret bank account and i just punched in the right pin.
Way too stoned bro. Was laying down on my back and thought for a good 30 mins what it would be like to be a turtle stuck on its shell
Did you really just call a picture of your erect penis art?
yeah I had to wear a fucking diaper from work home so I didn't get the shitty squirts all over my cars seats it was fucked
You know darned well I have a well-documented weakness for redheads, Subway and hand-drawn graphic novels.
We were 6 minutes into the movie before we realized the whole movie was spoken in Italian. That level of stupidly-ripped
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
