I wonder if she has a lisp when she orgasms...
It really wasent that hard. The male one had a M and the woman one had a W. I just couldent comprehend that at the time.
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
If my nicknames are based on what I throw up, you can call me Jimmy Johns
when she was 9 she got kicked out of our 4-H camp dance for pole dancing on the spirit stick
he also begged me to fake an orgasm when he couldn't get me to come.
I have to think about this realistically and not with my vagina.
Just served breakfast to a bunch of hella drunk kids. They kidnapped the birthday boy for his 21st and he was wearing a disney onesy and bunny ears. They've been drinking since before dawn, why don't we have friends like that?
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
One of your snapchats was of you with a 40oz of Mickeys and the caption: "Deep Throat back in her natural habitat"
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
You woke us up at 9:15 am still in your toga from last night saying "welcome to my house party...party". You had already filled up the pong cups with yaager/fireball and ordered a chicken platter... Who even delivered that that early???
You just managed to turn Doctor Seuss into a sext. I really like you now.
I don't need inspirational quotes. If I'm going to be motivated, it will be by anger and spite.
You know that voice that tells you to do something spontaneous after 1am? Don't listen to it.
Randomize
