i feel like the song jizz in my pants was made for him.
pretty sure mid blowjob I told him I needed to call you and ask you if this was whore-ish. He hid my phone from me.
its officail im naming my first born child brickbreaker
I should be nowhere even remotely near facebook in this condition.
She looked like a pterodactyl.....but dude i love dinosaurs
Getting blown during the Cavs game doesn't make it any less depressing.
You were pretty dunk by the time you introduced the vase as your best friend.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
My one night stand just messaged me and said he is praying for me...
He was Jesus for Halloween and I definitely got on my knees and gave him praise.
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
I feel like it is our duty to make homophobic people more afraid of us. They're never going to change, but maybe we can get to a "wrath of god" kind of worship-him-or-he'll-destroy-you-with-his-care-bear-stare type thing.
We are no longer allowed to make spur of the moment decisions about our love lives
ABSOLUTELY NOT
Randomize
