Far right against the wall..hiding come find me. dont tell oyhers hahaha
That bitch is like a bad destiny's child song.
His text read: Sex? I replied: Not drunk enough. He bought 4 more rounds and tantalized me with the offer pizza later. This could be the beginning of a beautiful relationship.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
I was just told that i'm a premature cuddler. . . What does that even mean?
Whatever it is you failed
No, no... it's pale and surrounded by awkward, curly, red hair. It's the Ronald McDonald of penises.
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
I may have just masturbated while on hold with the IRS. don't judge me
Worst case: you're extra horny, have no control of your mouth or actions, and maybe murder someone. Child's play.
He just turned down phone sex for hockey and I'm so relieved I'm fucking a straight guy that I'm barely even mad
Youre saying I should leave him? Have you seen the dating pool these days? It's terrifying, and in the capital region it's straight Norman Bates
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize
